Ground Hog Day in Cincinnati

I can safely say today that I rolled all worst-case traveling scenarios into one giant event - and made some new Iowa friends along the way. I have never flown through Cincinnati before, and frankly, I'm not too wild about doing it again any time soon!

My flight home for the holidays started after a night of no sleep, as I was afraid I would miss my flight if I caught a nap after packing my bag at 2:00 a.m. The Reagan National airport Delta desks were a mosh pit with short-tempered clerks, frustrated passengers, and very ill-defined check-in lines. Welcome to airport holiday madness. After surviving security and a grumpy bagel man, the flight to Cincinnati went off without a hitch. In the air to Cedar Rapids, I dozed off and awakened during landing to hear the flight attendant announce, "Welcome to Cincinnati. We apologize for the delay and appreciate your patience." Cincinnati? I thought that the attendant was confused, as she makes the trip between Cincinnati and Cedar Rapids often and could easily swap the cities. As it turned out, we had made it within fifteen minutes of landing in Cedar Rapids, but our plane was not equipped with de-icing equipment to handle landing in the fog, and we had to turn around and catch the jet stream back to Cincinnati, landing just fifteen minutes after we were expected in CR.

After a half hour of resetting the crew and finding another aircraft, we boarded a second flight to CR in the rain with news that the fog was worsening in eastern Iowa. We soon learned that a handle above the cockpit jutted out, and we had to wait twenty minutes for a mechanic with a broom to tap the handle back in to place and file paperwork before leaving the gate. Take-off was normal, but immediately after doing so, an acrid, burning smell filled the cabin and made all of us a bit uneasy. The plane did not achieve its normal altitude and chugged along at a fairly slow place. The attendant Judy, who was terrific in attempted flights one and two to CR, got on the intercom and announced after just ten minutes into the flight, "Folks, you have probably noticed the smell in the cabin. The pilots are concerned, and we are going to turn around and head back to Cincinnati." Apparently, a potential fire caused our landing to be declared an air emergency, and fire trucks and ambulances surrounded our plane when we pulled in to the gate. A shaken Judy was escorted off the plane and to an ambulance. When we walked into the terminal, the gate agents were a bit surprised to see us yet again. We likened this to the movie "Ground Hog Day" where the same events occur over and over. (I think that after today, I might just have to rent this movie.)

The terminal quickly grew to a frenzy at this point - flights to DSM, Kansas City, and Chicago were overbooked and begging for volunteers to take later flights. Delta decided to send our "burned" plane to the hanger for inspection and were attempting to find us another flight - AND another crew. Some new friends and I headed to the bar with food vouchers for beer and dessert to await news slow in coming. Delta wouldn't cover a bus ticket or rental car fees to get to Iowa, so as a back-up, I booked myself on the first open CR flight - at 9:55 p.m. Friday night. After three hours, we caught word that a new flight was ready for us, and amidst much cheering, we happily boarded.

No misplaced handle, ambulances, or burning ... we were off to a good start attempt number three. The new flight attendant - now on hour fourteen of his shift - was superb and offered cocktails on the house. I relaxed and waited for my mojito. After twenty minutes, a soft-spoken pilot broke through to announce, "Folks, you're used to hearing this message, but we are heading back to Cincinnati ... we sincerely apologize for the delay, but our de-icing equipment is now working too well and overheating. We will do everything we can to get you to Cedar Rapids." A gal two rows in front of me started crying - she had planned a surprise birthday party for her mother tonight with several family members and friends and was to be the surprise guest herself. She was flying in to CR tonight and returning to Greensboro tomorrow. Even if she could make the later flight to DSM, she was not going to make it to celebrate in time. The gal across the way was upset she didn't get her free cocktail, and a cute baby girl named Ellen handled the three take-offs and touch-downs better than the rest of us.

We waited at the gate in Cincinnati for the third time, and a service rep said that she had never seen this before and said that the Delta vice-president had chartered a flight for all of us to CR tomorrow morning. Fog was preventing any Midwestern flights for the rest of the evening. We received a free hotel stay and were able to get our luggage, and despite being frazzled, I was (yet again) impressed with the good humor and genuine concern of all the current and former Iowans stuck together on this adventure.

One young man (who used to wrestle against guys in my high school class - small world!) who was flying home from Montana was facing the second night in a row in a hotel due to flight delays, rerouting, and cancelations. Two others work in D.C., and we are getting together in a couple of weeks. And two gals living in Boston offered me a place to stay if I ever wanted to visit. We adopted the Vermont born and raised man whose mother just moved to Mount Pleasant and helped a fourteen-year-old get in touch with her parents.

Back at the hotel, we discussed what happened differently to us today than what normally happens when we fly to play on our superstitious reasoning for today's flights. We called ourselves the Iowa ComAir groupies and bonded over Domino's pizza and a pack of Coronas. We even swapped e-mail addresses and discussed setting up a My Space page. After we told the delivery man our story of three attempted flights, he told us seriously, "There was a reason you weren't supposed to go to Cedar Rapids today. I have a rosary in my car. Do you want it?"

We all hope that attempt number four will be a safe and successful one tomorrow morning, as we are all looking forward to getting home to our families. And even though the day was long, it ended in new friendships and the realization (yet again) that Iowa is a great place to call home.

Merry Christmas, everyone! And may you get home safely ...